Xavier Xerxes Xenophanes the tenth
You’re never gonna meet another guy like him
When he talks it’s kinda hard to understand
Cause every word he speaks starts with an “X”

I don’t just mean xenon or xeroscape or xylophone
I’m talking every single word that he knows
Like when he says, “house”, or “tree”, or “tomato”
It sounds like “xouse”, or ”xree”,. or “xomato”

And when he’s walking down the street and says, “How do you do?”
It might sound a little bit like “Xow xo xou xo?”
Don’t panic.  I’ll tell you what you do.
Smile right back and say, “Xine, xank xou!”

Xavier Xerxes Xenophanes the tenth
He may talk kinda funny, but it’s catchy my friend
And if you’re not careful you’re gonna be talking like him”

Xavier was at the grocery store
He was looking for just one thing more
He saw the grocer, and said, “Xexcuse xe”
“Xi xeed xome xassitance xlease.”

The grocer just stood there scratching his head
He was quiet, so Xavier said
“Xi’m xooking xor xhe xarshmellows.  Xan xou xelp xe?”
The grocer said, “xaisle xwenty xhree!”

Xavier Xerxes Xenophanes the tenth
He may talk kinda funny, but it’s catchy my friend
And if you’re not careful you’re gonna be talking like him”

Xavier went down to the pet shop
He bought a dog and he named him Xpot
He told Xpot to “Xit!” He told him to “Xtay!”,
But the dog just walked away

He said “xoll xover” but the dog didn’t move
He said “Xlay xead” but the dog just looked confused
Finally Xavier said, “xpeak”, and don’t you know
That dog said, “xoof xoof xooooooooow”

Xavier Xerxes Xenophanes the tenth
He may talk kinda funny, but it’s catchy my friend
And if you’re not careful you’re gonna be talking like him”

Xavier was feeling all alone
He called Xena on the telephone
Xena picked up the receiver and she said, “Hello”
Xaivier said, “Xi Xeni, Xow’s xit xoing?”

Xena thought for a second or two
Then she said, “Xavier?  Is that you?”
Xavier was feeling kinda nervous that day
But he worked up the courage to say

“Xoh Xena, Xi xink xour xeally xreat!”
“Xould xou xike xo xo xon xa xate?”
“Xaybe xe xould xo xo xa xovie.”
Xena said, “Xertainly!  Xat xounds xroovy!”

Xavier Xerxes Xenophanes the tenth
He may talk kinda funny, but it’s catchy my friend
And if you’re not careful you’re gonna be talking like him”

Xavier Xerxes Xenophanes the tenth
You’re never gonna meet another guy like him
People think he talks kinda strange it’s true
But eventually they start talking like him too

Everybody’s doing it no matter where you turn
People are talking just like Xavier
Anywhere you go you can surely bet
You’ll hear people starting all their words with an “X”

It’s spreading everywhere around the xorld
Uh-oh did I just say xorld?
Xoh no, Xow Xi’m Xalking xike xim!
Xoh well… Xif xou xan’t xeat ‘em, xoin ‘em

Xavier Xerxes Xenophanes xhe xenth
Xe xay xound xinda xunny, xut xit’s xatchy xy xriend
Xandx if xou’re xot xareful xou’re xonna xe xalking xike xim”